It’s like a jungle sometimes

Good evening, all! It’s been several weeks since my last confession and, as you may have noted, a whole new year has begun. Here’s hoping you all had a splendiferous time.

We had as peaceful a Christmas as can be had with an overexcited 2 year-old who’s just eaten breakfast-in-bed of smarties and chocolate coins. (Given that Daddy and I had popped open the fizz by 9am, who were we to judge?)

Besides a handful of excellent gatherings at either end, we seemed to spend most of our festive season holed up indoors avoiding the horrors of the weather.  In days of yore, G and I had a post-Xmas tradition of drawing the blinds and spending several dreamy, horizontal days playing console games and eating leftovers & pizza. Oh, those wistful memories. 

Suffice to say, two weeks with a stir-crazy microbe has a different flavour. It wasn’t long before I would have paid double (nay, TRIPLE!) if only nursery would re-open!

After Xmas, Ocado started started pimping random non-food things at me and, being the world’s most suggestible woman, I found myself adding a farm-themed room makeover kit to my shopping basket. This random act of whimsy meant that I spent my remaining days off work visiting Homebase and re-painting the Microbe’s walls to look like hills and sky, in prep for the animal onslaught.

Now that the job is done – I’d say it was well worth it. We’re all dead impressed by these stickers (not least Farmer James himself, who celebrated by sleeping in his own bed all night!) *hark the trumpets of incredulity*

So – what else is new? Well, the boy has settled back into nursery and thrown himself once again into the heady, tempestuous love/hate relationship with his little pal, Sam-crobe. Our conversations often go a bit like this…

“What did you and Sam fight about at nursery today?”
“Lego”
“Oh dear. What did you do?”
“I threw Sam’s lego on the floor”
“And what did Sam do?”  *stern, frowny-face*
“He cried”
“Well, that was a very sad choice wasn’t it?”  *double frowny face*
“Yes”
“And that’s not how we treat our friends, is it?”
“No”
“So you won’t do that again will you?”
“No”  (…until around 4pm tomorrow, obv)

The other day G turned up and found James wearing a pink dress and toting a handbag.  I asked him later on whether he was ‘being a princess’ and he said “No, Mummy, I was being like you”  Bless!  (NB: I don’t actually own a pink princess dress).

Other than that, Daddy and I continue to get our kicks from programming the microbe with inappropriate phrases. The other day whilst horsing about on the bed, we had this little exchange…

Mummy, don’t push me”
“No, of course not! We must never push people”
“No.”
 *solemn face*
“Do you know what to say if someone pushes you at nursery?”
“I don’t know, mummy”
“You say: “
Don’t – push – me – cos – I’m – close – to – the – edge“.
*intense stare*
“Can you say that?”

“Yes” 
“Go on then. What do you say if someone pushes you?”
“Don’t – push – me – cos – I’m – close – to – the – fridge!”
*parental snigger-fest*  
“Yes! Definitely say that!”

Sometimes his regurgitated phrases result in some weirdly grown-up-sounding dialogue…

“Mummy I am in the kitchen with daddy, You can join us if you like”
“Oh, Can I James?”  
“Yes, mummy, I’m sure you can.” *blessedly oblivious to sarcasm*  

“Why, thank you

He’ll also store and repeat the silliest of throwaway utterances with as much gravitas as those that you’ve laboured to instil.   Hence his robo fish are now treated to a cry of

Swim free, my pretties!” (whenever he releases them into the bath)

Robo fish??  You may well ask.  Just the latest things dreamed up by muggles. James got a couple in his stocking and here is an extremely amateurish video of them in action…

Now I shall say farewell with a selection of pics of our festive doings…  (ahem – and a promise of thank-you notes sometime before 2015)

Flaked out with Helena at Granny and Pops’s house

Hanging up festive bird seed cakes on Christmas Eve.

Rainy Christmas walk

Flaked out again in preparation for his night shift with Rudolph

Christmas morning!

First the presents from Father C (the boylet dragged his stocking into our bedroom so that G and I could witness the grand opening like a pair of indulgent, bleary-eyed, grinning fools)

Then presents under the tree…

Amazing 3D jigsaw…

Post-Christmas jigsaw fun at Uncle Alistair’s house, with Auntie Loretta, Niamh and Olivia.

Stepping out in his new cardigan from Auntie Pippa

And the world’s cutest flying hat!

Staying up late with Leo and Erin on New Year’s Eve…

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About Susan Flockhart

Bonsai lady-geek and blogger. I can hardly recall what I used to blog about pre-microbes, but these days I generally ramble about motherhood, nonsense and whatever's going on the world of tiny people
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