O Tannenbaum, O what the hell…?

Whatever I said in my last post, you might as well discount it all. Our household has sunk well and truly into a fuzzy, pre-Xmas fug. I can’t even blame it all on the microbe because I’m starting to feel prematurely festive myself and it’s only going to get worse from here.  On Saturday we’re planning a jaunt to Winchester (aka the most christmassy town in Britain).

Last weekend the boybot’s Santa suit arrived from Tesco, in readiness for the nursery play. I made the schoolgirl error of letting him see it, along with a vague instruction to “leave it alone until the play”.

Who was I kidding?

It took about 30 seconds before he snuck off to his room and rustled about suspiciously. When G and I investigated, we found that he’d donned the whole ensemble by himself and was parading about in front of his wardrobe mirror.

So we threw care to the wind and gave him a cardboard box to use as a sleigh…


NB: this year the role of Rudolph will be played by teddy…


In other pre-festive ramblings, I’ve gone a bit blank over what sort of cards to make with the microbe this year. He’s 100% craft mad but I have to come up with something suitably easy for a 3 year old. Last year we glued on felt shapes but I need my thinking cap for a new idea…

IMG_3084I spotted a nifty 3D card idea on Pinterest and had a go at making one as a throwaway amusement for the boy. Alas, he was insufficiently whelmed.

“Mummy, why hasn’t it got any tinsel?”
“Not all trees have tinsel”
“And why hasn’t it got baubles?”
“And why hasn’t it got any chocolates on it?”
“Oh, for the love of…  what do you mean, chocolates?”

Here dawned an unexpectedly spirited conversation regarding chocolates on Christmas trees, which culminated in G announcing: “I shall be putting my foot down on this“.  (Apparently it’s bordering on child abuse not to cover your tree in Cadbury).

Fair enough, though I have no idea how we’ll regulate the eating of these chocolates. I fully anticipate trudging out of bed on day two and finding a chocolate-smeared boy skulking under the tree amid a pile of wrappers.

Still, things could be a lot worse…

This week someone asked me to re-tweet a link to these lovelies which are being peddled on a website called Give Lynda her Last Christmas.


Because what every Xmas tree needs is a clear plastic bauble containing an oxo cube, yes?

I was compelled to share this exciting news with G, who immediately asked “Who is Lynda and why is someone raising funds for a hit on her in the new year?

Then he added “I’m still confused as to how an oxo bauble will bring her back from the dead to enjoy the festivities”  (We share the same brain, dear reader.)

But, fear not, all is made clear on the website.

“By hanging this bespoke bauble on your tree this year, Lynda will be a part of all of our family’s Christmas. Although her wish, will not quite be fulfilled, she will be remembered in style this Christmas”

“In style”, I tell you! So get buying. It’s what she would have wanted.

Yes, alright, I know I’m going to hell. But, in all seriousness, that website looks more than a little scammy to me.  The header states “£1 for every bauble will be donated to Action against charity.” Action against charity, you say?

And, even if you give their typos the benefit of the doubt, googling “Action Against Cancer” leads to a dead web link. So I’d suggest that anyone interested might like to donate their bauble money to Cancer Research instead

Lynda-baubleFor anyone still tempted, there’s more! The same person also tweeted these, which you can buy on eBay!Just think – an entirely Lynda-themed tree could be yours! Hooray for cashing in on someone’s death.

Well, I suppose that’s enough snark and nonsense from me.  So I shall go away and report back when I have something more useful to say.

About Susan Flockhart

Bonsai lady-geek and blogger. I can hardly recall what I used to blog about pre-microbes, but these days I generally ramble about motherhood, nonsense and whatever's going on the world of tiny people
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