There are boys in my house running up and down the hallway singing Elton John’s I’m Still Standing with the words “poo poo head” instead of “yeah yeah yeah.”
This is my life. Kindly send emergency kit.
Last night I asked G if he could remember a time when we did not measure our evenings in units of “awakeness”. One of us would ask “What do you fancy doing tonight?” and the other would utter some variation on “whatever the hell we feel like“, with never an expectation that our evening might end before midnight.
Nowadays, it’s more like this:
*THUNK* (boy’s animal encyclopaedia falls off his sleeping head).
*Bumpy bump-bump* (girl rampages around bedroom).
Semi-conscious on sofa 1: “Stop playing Minecraft and put the telly on. You’re wasting my awake time”
Semi-conscious on sofa 2: “Ok”
Sofa 1: “How much awakeness have you got left?”
Sofa 2: “Dunno”
Sofa 1: “Can you manage a Fargo or does it have to be 30 mins or less?”
Sofa 2: “I can definitely manage a Fargo” .
Sofa 2: “Zzzzzzzzzz….”
Sofa 1 *prods sofa 2 awake*
9:10 – 9:45pm:
Fargo paused 87 times as girl comes downstairs and is sent back to bed on loop.
Girl wails “I’m not very well!” in the belief that this grants immediate licence to stay downstairs and be cuddled by Daddy.
Parents give up carrying screaming girl back to bed and let her sit on the stairs.
Girl falls asleep on the stairs and is carried back to bed
Sofa 1 and Sofa 2 pour more wine and are asleep before first sip
I chatted to Hubble’s carer at nursery and (aside from being both perpetrator and victim of much biting) it turns out she’s been napping for up to three hours every day! So I’ve asked them to impose a new 1-hour nap limit and we shall see how that works out…
Her language skills are coming along in leaps and bounds and I’ve had to remind myself on a daily basis that she can understand (and repeat) WAY more than I give her credit for. I should probably stop calling her Snotgoblin and Satan’s Little Helper …and start correcting her when she refers to the alphabet as “ADD”.
“Mummy, ADD!” (Yes dear.)
In boy news, the summer hols have commenced and he is now off school until
eternity 6th Sep. I am doing Mon and Fri and G is doing mid-week, with some help from summer camp.
For reasons known only to himself, boy spent the very first day of his Summer hols making 3D halloween cards.
Here be video nonsense…
The crafting of pop-ups is entirely my fault and I must confess that his unseasonal pumpkin card gave me an even better idea. I’ve decided that my (ahem – our) next little fad will be to learn how to make cards with LED lights in them, using copper tape and coin batteries. Will report back with pics…